Top 3 Reasons Why I DO NOT Debate Theology or Argue Religion

Written By Pastor Marcos

I have some pretty clear views that both conservative, fundamentalist Adventists and ex/anti-Adventists disagree with.

And while I have been known to go back and forth on comments a few times, for the most part I do not debate my views with people who disagree with me. You won’t find me on an ex-SDA forum going toe to toe with the folk who hate Adventism. And you won’t find me on a podcast with conservatives debating why I reject LGT, perfectionism, etc.

In this post I am sharing the top 3 reasons why I never do that sort of thing.

#1 - Debating is a skill.

In case you didn’t know it, debating people is not something that everyone can do. It requires a certain temperament and skill to do it well. If you don’t have that temperament or skill, you can still debate – but you’ll probably get steamrolled by someone who thinks faster, is more aggressive, and has snappier, on-the-spot comebacks. I do not have this skill in the least. I suck at debating. I suck at arguing. I do not think fast or rebound well in those environments. It doesn’t mean I am not well versed in what I believe – it simply means I don’t have the ability to argue about it well. How do I know? Because I used to do it ALL the time until I accepted the fact that I just can’t debate. Not only am I not good at it, the whole thing affects my mental health negatively so I don’t do it anymore.

#2 - 9/10 debating is about "proving" that I’m "right" and you’re "wrong".

And can I be honest? I am so over the whole "let me prove to you why I’m right" thing. If you don’t believe what I believe and you aggressively reject it... then cool. I have zero interest in convincing anyone of anything. I share what’s on my heart. I put it out there in the world. And for those who resonate – let’s journey together. For those who don’t... enjoy whatever it is you like. I ain’t losing no sleep over it.

#3 - Admiral Ncube shared a post last week that really hit the nail. It says, "Never provide a well-reasoned argument for someone who has demonstrated a commitment to misunderstanding you."

And honestly, in all my years debating anti-Adventists and fundamentalist Adventists, I have only ever encountered one person - a former SDA turned Catholic - who actually wanted to understand me. Other than this one person, who I think highly of to this day, the rest of those debates were colossal wastes of time. The sad truth is, religion is full of folk with next to zero EQ who think you owe them an explanation for everything... and I’m just not interested anymore.

Here’s a quick story to illustrate. A few years ago I got into a debate with an anti-trinitarian. We spent probably 2 weeks going back and forth on a Facebook comment thread. It was exhausting because homegirl was NASTY (super aggressive, accusatory, bullying behavior)... But I kept going because I thought I was actually helping this lady by answering her questions and giving her a different perspective. Then, toward the end of our debate I presented a series of arguments to settle the issue. She tried biting back, but it was clear that I had her cornered. And naïve little me honestly thought that I was going to wake up the next day to find that she had seen the light and decided to go back to scripture and study more.

Nope.

Instead, she deleted her ENTIRE FB account so that the whole thread disappeared. Then, 2 weeks later she had created a new account and I ran into her in another thread with another poor schmuck she had suckered into another debate using the SAME EXACT arguments I had already answered during those 2 weeks of wasted time.

This was the day I decided, NEVER AGAIN.

If you want to debate me, good luck with that. ’Cause I ain’t interested.

Yes, I still have conversations with people who disagree with me. But my number 1 rule is I only do it in good faith. If you come at me swinging, with accusations and attacks… or if its clear to me that you’ve pre-loaded me with motives, character flaws, or ignorance before the conversation has even begun… you can tick one on your scorecard and call it a win... cause I ain’t even gonna play...

One more story... I chaired a board meeting years ago where this coalition of ultra-conservatives decided to waste everyone’s sacred time with an argument about Christmas (booooring)... Anyways... I’ll never get that night back but that’s beside the point. The thing that blew my mind was how this group worshiped Ellen White, hyper-quoted her for everything, and judged anyone who tried to "explain away" her "straight testimony". They branded themselves as the guardians of truth who were there to defend the written word.

But what do you think happened when I shared direct quotes of Ellen White where she advocates for Christmas, including even having a Christmas tree in the church? Did they say, "oh yeah... we are wrong."

I wish! Instead they started doing a series of theological backflips and acrobatics that would make a circus performer jealous. I mean, it was impressive. And I realized in that moment – such folk could care less about truth. What they want is power. And these debates legitimize their lust for power. It gives the illusion that what they have to say is worth anyone’s time. And I for one, refuse to contribute to that illusion. So I’m done.

Instead, I focus on the seekers and believers who are searching for the beauty of God’s heart. I journey, empower, equip, and inspire them. We hang out, have deep discussions, and even disagreements! All in good faith, with love in our hearts, with humanity in our breath, with wonder in our eyes.

I don’t want to live in an echo chamber, but I also don’t want to live in hostile crossfire, trading jabs with folk who need a therapist (and yeah... maybe even a glass of wine and a foot massage) instead of another religious argument.

Life’s too short. No thanks.

If you are reading this and you are a pastor or creator putting your message out into the world, here is my encouragement – find your tribe... the people who build you up... and focus on empowering them. Love on them. Nurture them. Create beauty with them. As you do, protect your mental health. Guard your emotional well-being. Value your time more than gold. And do not give your energy to people who don’t deserve it.

But the Bible already told you that... "do not cast your pearls..."

I’m done. 😉

Is your local Adventist church stuck doing the same stuff that hasn’t worked in over 50 years?

If you answered yes, I made each of these resources for you:

Pastor Marcos https://www.thestorychurchproject.com
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